It’s Been Awhile

Hey there Future Husband!

I know I know. It’s been more than a month since I’ve written to you! I’m so sorry. I sometimes think about writing to you but then I’m not sure. It’s not that I don’t want to talk to you, I do! I love writing to you and sharing my life with you. Because that’s what we will be doing for the rest of our lives.

I’ve been working on myself. Physically. Mentally. And spiritually. For awhile, I’ve felt lost and unsure of myself. I know who I am & what I do, but I don’t know what I want. At first, I thought I wanted a serious relationship, live here and stay with my current job. But right now I feel so desperate to escape. I don’t know where or  what I’ll be doing. I just feel stuck. I want to leave.

I don’t want a relationship for awhile either. I’m getting to know myself, a newer and ever changing me. I’m finally putting myself first and trying to make myself happy instead of others. I’ve spent 24 yrs of my life trying to make the best decisions that made others happy and doing what would benefit them. But it’s time to do things for myself. I tried so hard to be perfect. But I’m not and I won’t ever be. I make a lot of mistakes and sometimes I make them over and over again. Please still love me for that. I won’t ever be perfect, love me in spite of that. Love me for my imperfections. I know I do. & I will love you too for that.

We will make mistakes. Some big. Some small. Sometimes together and sometimes not. But we will be perfect for each other! And for that, I can’t wait to meet you.

Until next time…

Love,

Your Future Wife